Publishing positive education information for parents and teachers since 2000

Goodbye Bullying and Hello Kindness

by Beverley Densham

My wish is that every child gets to talk about how they feel at the beginning and end of every single day, that they feel they can do this and that they are heard and, that it is safe to do this. May every class registration and assembly and home have this element included, because every child deserves this.  Do you know  It can help both prevent bullying and alert us to what is going on as well. Equally I believe it can make the bullies themselves kinder, more loving and nicer people, if they too are given a chance.

A problem shared is a problem halved

Have you read the statistics?

 

They aren’t good, we frequently see it in the news, cyber-bullying and bullying. Sadly suicides happen where children and teenagers are desperately suffering in silence. It’s not always about not having a good family background either, so many children like I did, started off in life as acutely shy, sensitive children.

 

What about these children? They need to be given a chance to speak out too, they need to be given permission to talk about how they feel . They often have a complete block about this.  The happy kids cards are a wonderful and fun tool to help them to “bring themselves out of their shell” and have that important voice.

 

I am extremely passionate about this topic as I started off life happy, at school and home, yet my severe shyness was a problem - I didn’t tell anyone how I was feeling, or if something was upsetting me or I was facing challenges. When I was teased at secondary school by some girls in my year, I didn't tell anyone and it was an ongoing thing that was always “there”, that horrible knawing pain that needs to be shared.

 

The saying, “a problem shared is a problem halved” is so, so true.  Neither side ever got the opportunity to change for the better, because I didn’t talk, I didn’t speak to anyone, I didn’t tell.

 

So my wish is that every child gets an opportunity to do this.

 

By 2005 the birth to my son Sammy.  Fortunately I had survived two near-death experiences of a road traffic accident and during childbirth. By 2008 I had called the police due to domestic violence. It took  too many years for me to speak out because when you’ve been abused and  isolated in so many ways that you become less and less likely to tell anyone. Eventually I made the call and social services escorted me and my then 3 year old son from the family home. We survived. I don’t want any child or person to have to go through such pain and trauma, EVER. Starting from the grassroots is the key in my opinion.

Something has to change

My work colleague and friend didn’t survive. She died due to domestic violence, a dire consequence of bullying at its most severe. Leaving behind beautiful innocent children.  Nobody deserves this.

 

Something has to change.

 

 

Thriving

 It’s taken seven years to recover and publicly speak out, part of that recovery, healing and building of self esteem and self confidence was using the Happy Kids Cards. Fifty-two positive affirmation cards to bring more happiness, confidence & calm to children's lives and you. Tools enable you to ask for help, to ask those you trust and love for help, to find an inner calm and peace through meditation and relaxation, to be able to be honest and always tell the truth to someone you love and/ or trust. When you pick the friends cards message of “I enjoy spending fun time with my friends”, that in a school environment that each and every child knows that they can ask for help if there’s bullying going on.

 

It is unacceptable behaviour, something which nobody deserves. We only deserve to be treated well and of course this isn’t the behaviour of a friend.

 

 

My wish is that the cards are used more and more in schools as a tool for five minutes daily, to give children a chance to live with a more growth mindset, with more positivity , fun, calm and serenity in their life. Something they look forward to and can support them during the good, challenging and sad times of life.

 

I created a Bev's Kids colouring channel where children can enjoy happy colouring and it also gives them a chance to express themselves in the colouring of how they’re feeling such as “believe in yourself” colouring to build their self esteem & confidence.

Using happy cards

My son once said at bedtime: “What I like about me is...................”

 

Fill in the blank for you as and adult.

 

Then ask your students/pupils this question.

 

They may need you to give them some examples. The shy children or those with low self esteem may need really regular practice at this, one great tip for teachers is to reverse this initially.

 

For everyone to say what they like about each other, just one thing, and then to think of one thing they like about themselves. Drawing pictures is a very easy way for children to express themselves, through drawing, writing and then talking about it. The quick fix method is pick a card and talk. The cards are for children of all ages and work well with autistic and bereaved children who are then able to speak out about bullying.

 

My wish is you use them WITH the bully too. Give all a chance to individually say what it means to them and that they can talk to you, a teacher, their parent/caregiver anytime they need help. Lets bring LOTS OF FUN to school, to education with the happy kids cards, children enjoy using them.

 

Primary school teacher Kayleigh Hollis in Dorset, UK says: “As a class teacher the day can be manic and extremely busy so it can be difficult finding the time to just have some quiet reflective time with the class. However, since I bought the happy kids cards it has all changed! My class love them and use them when there’s a spare five minutes.  I’m always being asked, “Can we do the Happy Kids Cards yet?” I have definitely noticed a change in the overall attitude of my class they’ve become calmer and more positive. I’m hearing  less “I can’t” and hearing more I’ll try” – small steps but so important. The Happy Kids Cards are now definitely one of my valued resources”. Inspire your class everyday.

 

Goodbye bullying and hello kindness.

 

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About the Author

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Beverley Densham is an Author, Angel Coach and founder of the Happy Kids Cards to bring more happiness, confidence and calm to children’s lives and you. She graduated  from the University of Brighton (UK) with a degree in Sports Science and became a Pilates expert. Two near death experiences, domestic violence and divorce guided her to change direction. Studying with Doreen Virtue®, she became a certified Angel Therapy® Practitioner and now inspires others by living and teaching her Angelic Lifestyle. You can contact Beverley through her website: www.angeliclifestyle.com

Goodbye bullying and hello kindness.

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Publishing positive education information for parents and teachers since 2000

Publishing positive education information for parents and teachers since 2000
Publishing positive education information for parents and teachers since 2000

Publishing positive education information for parents and teachers since 2000

Publishing positive education information for parents and teachers since 2000

Publishing positive education information for parents and teachers since 2000

Publishing positive education information for parents and teachers since 2000

Publishing positive education information for parents and teachers since 2000

Publishing positive education information for parents and teachers since 2000

Publishing positive education information for parents and teachers since 2000

Publishing positive education information for parents and teachers since 2000

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